During a visit to the magnificent Louvre in Abu Dhabi, I was on my way out past the last few exhibits when a piece of visual art by the Saudi artist, Maha Mulla stopped me in my tracks. A selection of 11 blackened cooking pots of varying sizes, mounted on a plain white wall caught my attention. What was it about this striking display that had such a profound effect on me?
My imagination transported me back in time to groups of people who would have come together around these simmering pots to enjoy each other’s company, exchange stories and share experiences. These battered old pots represented a time when people were part of a community. They represented our connections to one another and our communication with one another. They epitomised who we are – a community, people with a voice who want to be heard and who want to be seen.
Social distancing has had a profound effect on our awareness. We have been reminded of the intricate way in which we are all connected. High speed internet allows us to connect to one another through various programs and applications, and yet even with these, we often feel increasingly disconnected and unheard. We may have good internet, but we are experiencing poor connections.
No one can live in isolation, every choice we make has a ripple effect. We thought it was ok to hide behind our social media apps such as SMS and WhatsApp – reply to the messages when it suits us, ignore them when it doesn’t, say what we feel without much thought about the person on the receiving end. How often do people make damaging comments on Face Book and other platforms, simply because they cannot be held accountable? People who you do not even know, feel they have the right to pass judgement and make invasive and abusive comments about you. Social media has allowed us to disappear into the crowd, without taking any responsibility for our actions. It is time to rethink what we do and how we behave – we are still part of a greater human community.
‘I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgement; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.’ – Dr Brene Brown
The change must begin with us. Redefine the way we choose to communicate and connect with each other.
Most of our relationships are based on effective communication skills. We can no longer take these for granted. The days when we could meet together in close proximity, where I could read your body language, listen to the tone of your voice, examine your facial expressions, and focus on what your eyes are telling me have changed. We are having to rethink how we successfully express ourselves.
‘Each contact with a human being is so rare, so precious, one should preserve it.’ – Anais Nin
Text messages often fail us miserably. These short and cryptic messages cannot convey the true essence of our emotional state. We throw in a few emojis for emphasis but even they can be easily misinterpreted.
Pick up the phone and make the call, someone wants to hear your voice – they need to tune in to the subtle signals which only your voice can convey.
Switch on your skype and have a proper conversation – someone wants to see your smile or the way you turn your head when you laugh. You are a package deal – the way you turn up to speak to me will tell me volumes about your state of mind, how you are feeling and how important I am to you.
If we are connecting for a business call – dress smart, turn on your camera and take pride in being seen. Your body language tells me everything about your character, your emotions and your general well-being.
High speed internet will connect us, but it is how we choose to show up that will ultimately determine the quality of the connection and the success of the conversation. Take responsibility for your thoughts, they become your words which result in actions. Make time to connect, take time to talk – someone is waiting to hear from you.
Comments